About Time

According to the monitor on my new All In One computer it is 11:35 pm on 2/2/19. Is it really? Seems like I was just a child. If there is no mirror around, sometimes I still think I am a child…unless I sit in one place too long and then I feel like it is really 11:35 pm on 2/2/19.

Went to see a new doctor on 2/1/19 at 3:00 pm. My old doctor, well, he isn’t really old, I should say, my former doctor, he lost everything on 11/8/18 when the fire went through our town. He closed up his practice. I liked him. He liked me too. Sometimes he would spend 45 minutes with me, just talking about how fat I was, how Jesus was the answer, how the government was all screwed up, how I should retire for my health’s sake. He cared about me. After the fire, I went to his temporary office and told him thank you and that he was the best doctor ever. It stopped him from talking so much…and he said, “Thank you.”

The new doctor seemed like a cool guy. He likes to shoot guns at the local gun range. He said, “Except for your blood sugar levels, you’re doing pretty good.” I said, “Hmm.” I didn’t tell him how hard it has been making so many adjustments and how I try real hard to stay in control – and usually do – but then something little sets me off. Little stuff makes me crazy. I didn’t tell him how sick I am of people who just refuse to do their jobs competently and it fucks up my day – like the people who connect your phone, internet, and cable television – supposedly on 2/1/19 between 9 am and 11 am, but it takes up 6 hours and still it is not complete. Instead of getting pissed off, I made the technician some toasted bread with jam on it because he was hungry. The new doctor probably didn’t want to know that on 2/8/19 between 1 pm and 3 pm, the technician will return to finish the “simple” task that some computer somewhere screwed up. Computers don’t screw up, people using them do- but the computer gets blamed a lot. The new doctor’s nurse gave me a shot to protect me from pneumonia (holy shit I spelled it correctly the first time!) and she told me she lost her house in the Paradise fire too and that she meditates. I suddenly felt like crying. It was either because of the fire or the 6 hours spent with a hungry technician and yet no television, just a television bill… or maybe I was just missing God.

Well, it is now 12:01 am on 2/3/19. It is a new day, perhaps new ways are here. That shot I got on 2/1/19 at 3:35 pm in my right arm sure hurts now. Did you know that between 2/1/19 and 2/4/19 some places in the Sierra Nevada mountains might get up to 10 feet of snow?